It is funny that I spent the majority of my life running from God.
Now I feel the closest To Him by just walking WITH Him.
Not in front.
Not in the back.
Right beside Him.
If I run in front, I become anxious and fearful. Or act like a crazy person trying to control everything.
If I run behind, I act like I am not forgiven for the past. Pity party if you please.
He came to absorb the guilt and shame of all that is past and present.
He is amazing!
There is joy and peace that comes from just Walking with Him.
I think I ran from God because I didn't want to be disciplined.
Who in their right mind likes to be disciplined.
Never have been one to love being disciplined.
Just ask my momma;)
But, I look for how the Lord is disciplining me.
I am not scared of it anymore.
He is not like my earthly father.
Not one little bit.
He is better.
He is sweeter.
He is full of love, peace, joy and grace.
He wants me to be more like Him.
He loves me.
"For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it." Hebrews 12:11
Obedience leads to happiness.
So, right now I am Walking with Him and not running.
I am not going to be consumed with the "what if's."
The Lord with provide.
I trust Him.
In the Good, the Bad and the Ugly.