Sunday, October 27, 2013

working

it has been way to long since i have come to this blog.
this place where i use to pour my heart out to God. 
questions.
searching.
longing.
to hear Him.
to see Him.
to know Him.

i miss this little place.  
a place where i could be vulnerable.
a place to share.
a place to connect.
commune with Him.

He hasn't left.  
He is always with me.
But, to be honest....
there is this thing inside me that says,
"work harder. no. do it this way. don't quit. don't stop."

and that voice is not from Him.
it is the part of me that always wanted my daddy to want to be a part of my life.
to really want to see me grow up.  
to see who God created me to be.
and it has never happened.
 
i worked so hard to make him want to be a part of my life.
the rejection runs deep.
the hurt cuts like a knife.
 
But,
Jesus never has rejected me, 
even when i don't seek His face.
He still whispers my name and welcomes me back
with open arms.
 
and He has been whispering.
calling out to me.
stop working so hard, allison.
stop missing out.
stop fearing 
failure.
rejection.
betrayal.

Live.
In.
Me.

because I am 
the Only One Who
can give you 
life.
and give it 
abundantly.

 

Tuesday, May 21, 2013

One

One Year 
Anniversary
of 
Allie Mac.
Head on over to my friend, Kristi's blog 
and
read about how Allie Mac
started.
Also, you can enter to win a $75 credit
for an Allie Mac!


Monday, October 15, 2012

Ebenezers

Ebenezers.

"stone of help."

Why do I forget?  Why is it that the Good that He has done sometimes fades in the background of everyday life?  When I know and believe in the core of my being, that He is Good.  And He wants Good for me.

Early on in my walk with Christ, someone told me about "raising your ebenezers."  I went searching in the Bible and found this:

Samuel took a large stone and placed it between the towns of Mizpah and Jeshanah. He named it Ebenezer—"the stone of help"—for he said, "Up to this point the Lord has helped us!" —1 Samuel 7:12, NLT

Right now I feel like one of the stones is being chipped and reshaped.  And it doesn't feel so great.  Life is just hard right now.  When things get hard is where sometimes I forget.  But, today I remember.  I am raising my Ebenezers in praise and worship of the One Who loves me more than I can think or imagine.  So, here are a few of my Ebenezers:


  • the provision of marriage to my husband.
  • the restoration and redemption of our marriage.
  • my children get to experience life different than my early years.
  • the longing of my real father replaced by my Heavenly father.
  • a wonderful step father who loves me like his own.  What a gift.
  • sister's in Christ, who lift and encourage me daily.  Who point me to the Lord by showing me His love.
  • my real father asking for forgiveness at my grandmother's funeral.
There are so many more.  But, what an awesome way to start my day by remembering all He has done for me.  

This is an amazing blog post on Ebenezers.