The past couple of days I have just been in awe of my Lord. He just keeps reminding me of so many things. So, many things that it is hard to wrap my head around them. I feel like I need to write them down to remember them all. I don't want to forget. My memory has seemed to fade since I had children. I don't know if it is my ADD or what but I read it, I believe it and just can't remember everything.
Ok, I picked up 2 African American people the other day and took them to where they needed to go. I went to pay for Lawson's school and the woman was asking for food. I walked out behind her and she asked me to give her and her "friend" a ride. She then proceeded to tell me he just got out of prison and she was HIV positive.
My heart was racing. Pounding actually. I wanted to help so badly. But, I was so scared. The social worker came out in me and I asked her all kinds of questions. I didn't have any cash to give them for a cab. I told her that I couldn't because of the carseats in my car. I really had the whole 3rd row available. I got in my car.
I thought, I am scared but the Lord has been so good to me, I am CONFIDENT that He will take care of me. I got out of my car and told them to get in, amongst the mess. I told her that the Lord has been so good to me. She said that she asked others and one girl told her that she was just too scared. I said, I am too but I trust in the Lord. She proceeded to say that the reason why they were having trouble was because of family. I said, "I know how that is" referring to Joe. We continued to talk. I could smell the alcohol. I told them that my dad(Joe) is an addict. She said, "Oh, i have struggled with that my whole life".
We talked about the Lord, it felt so good to talk about Him with people I didn't even know. Because in some ways I am scared to talk to others about my faith. But, I believe that it was Him revealing to me the power that He has in taking care of me. they asked me where i went to church. We talked about how the Lord loves you even when you mess up as long as you repent.
I dropped them off at a police substation. She said, "I am Linda Doctor and I am going to pray for you father." I wished them luck and drove off.
On my way back to my house I had tears streaming down my face. There are so many people that are suffering in this world. But, I know that is where My Lord, does the best work. I look for Him all the time. What He is teaching me? Loving Him more and more everyday. Transforming. My life is being transformed by Him. By His Holy Spirit. I am happier than I have ever been. I am almost looking for the trials, to help keep me grounded and strong in my love for Him.
"Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out His love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom He has given us".