Comfort ***Allie Mac Quilt GIVEAWAY***

Comfort.

Life is hard, y'all.
Can I get an AMEN?

This past Monday I had an itching to make a quilt.  Not just any quilt but a scrappy quilt. A scrappy quilt is made of leftover fabrics.  I have been saving a huge plastic container of scrappy fabric love. As I was getting all my scrap love together I felt this stirring in my heart to make a quilt for someone who needed comfort. All day I prayed that God would lead the way to whoever was meant to have this quilt. I thought about the people I have made quilts for and how they tell me God has used the quilt I made to comfort them.  It is so sweet to hear but even sweeter because it is ALL HIM.

He wants to comfort us, y'all. And how quick we are to seek comfort in most everything but Him. He has gifted me with making quilts. For me it is a ministry for Him to reveal Himself in a very tangible way. For others to feel wrapped in Love. To be seen. To be known. To be comforted. Sewing has always been a very healing process for me.  I have seen Him stitch up the most broken places in my heart.  #hurtsogood

But let me tell you what happened to me this morning.

I have a new doctor appointment at 2 pm today. I have been really anxious about this appointment. New things scare me. Especially having to tell a new psychiatrist my life history. It is frightening for me. It stirs the deepest broken places in my heart (even the places He has stitched up). So, I decided to pull out Paul David Tripp's New Morning Mercies devotional. I have not cracked this book open in 2 years. And guess what....

I had a bookmark placed on today's devotional.

TODAY.

Accidental?

Nope, I don't think so.

July 19, 2017.

He led me to this today. Here is what it said:

"God puts you in hard moments when you cry out for comfort so that your heart becomes tender to those near you who need the same comfort."

What?

Oh, yes mam.

I am not going to write out the whole devotional but at the end he says,

"Here is how Paul captures this in 2 Corinthians 1: 'Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God...If we are afflicted, it is for your comfort and salvation; and if we are comforted, it is for your comfort' (vv. 3-6).  The hard moments are not just for your growth in grace, but for your call to be a tool of that same grace in the life of another sufferer. In difficulty, God is softening your heart and sharpening your edges so that you may be ready to make the comfort of the invisible Father visible in the life of the weary pilgrim he has placed in your pathway. God intends for you to give away the comfort you've been given. The grace that has given you hope is meant to spill over into hope for the person next to you. What a plan!"

Written by Paul David Tripp.

The kindness and comfort that He gives is not meant to be kept but given. 

Because when we share in the sufferings of this world with others we help to make Him known.

He is all around us. He is before us. He is behind us. Even in all the craziness of this world, He is with us. He is for us. He pursues us. He comforts us. He is really all we need. The One and Only Who can make all wrongs right.

So, will you help make Him known?

I am giving away this scrappy quilt to someone who needs His comfort.

This might be: 
•a person who is searching for Him.
•a person who is going through chemo.
•a person who is caregiving for someone who is dying or sick.
•a person who has gone through a rough patch and looking for Him but can't see or Find Him.
•a person whose wife/husband has had an affair or in the midst of an affair.
•a person whose wife/husband struggles with an addiction.
•a person who is feeling isolated and lost.
•a person who is suffering from PTSD.
•a woman who is struggling with infertility.
•a person who is struggling with their identity, who call for Him but He doesn't seem to answer.
•a person who is homeless.
•a child in foster care.
•a foster care parent.
•anyone who advocates for the people who have no voice.
•a person that you love that is just struggling. Is in the midst of uncertainty.
•a child with an incarcerated parent.
•a wife/husband with a spouse who is incarcerated.
•a wife/husband who has just lost their spouse.
•a daughter/son who has just lost a parent.
•a mother/father who has just lost a child.
•this person does NOT have to be a believer. We can't doubt the goodness of God and His plans for each person who has breath left inside of them. I didn't become a believer until age 31. So, trust me when I say there is HOPE. And He is faithful.

Here are the rules:

1. You can comment here on my blog or on my Instagram account @sewalliemac who you would like to give this quilt to.
2. This person can remain anonymous or not (maybe talk to them about you nominating them), but you have to share WHY you are nominating them. Why you feel like they need to feel His comfort right now in their life.
3. I want to hear your stories. I want to hear their stories. I truly believe that in sharing His story in our life, we are helping to make Him known and loved.
4. If you do not feel comfortable sharing for everyone to see, you may email me personally at sewalliemac@gmail.com. Your nomination will COUNT.
5. I will close the giveaway on Wednesday, July 26th at 9pm Eastern time.
6. The winner will be announced on Thursday, July 27th.
7. Then I will finish making the quilt for the winner. This way I will be able to pray for the person who will be receiving the Allie Mac quilt.
8. I will attempt to finish the quilt in one week and mail it to them or to you (if you would like to personally give it to them).
9. Feel free to share this on social media. This is how we will know other people's stories and how we can pray for people who are hurting. You do not have to know me or follow me on social media. This is not the purpose of this giveaway.
10. Don't let all these rules scare you off;)

I will be posting throughout the week different people I follow whose stories have touched me.

I absolutely can't wait to see how God is going to use this little scrappy quilt for His Glory and His comfort.

Blessings and love,
Allison

working

it has been way to long since i have come to this blog.

this place where i use to pour my heart out to God. 

questions.

searching.

longing.

to hear Him.

to see Him.

to know Him.

i miss this little place.  

a place where i could be vulnerable.

a place to share.

a place to connect.

commune with Him.

He hasn't left.  

He is always with me.

But, to be honest....

there is this thing inside me that says,

"work harder. no. do it this way. don't quit. don't stop."

and that voice is not from Him.

it is the part of me that always wanted my daddy to want to be a part of my life.

to really want to see me grow up.  

to see who God created me to be.

and it has never happened.

 

i worked so hard to make him want to be a part of my life.

the rejection runs deep.

the hurt cuts like a knife.

 

But,

Jesus never has rejected me, 

even when i don't seek His face.

He still whispers my name and welcomes me back

with open arms.

 

and He has been whispering.

calling out to me.

stop working so hard, allison.

stop missing out.

stop fearing 

failure.

rejection.

betrayal.

Live.

In.

Me.

because I am 

the Only One Who

can give you 

life.

and give it 

abundantly.

 

One

One Year 

Anniversary

of 

Allie Mac.

Head on over to my friend, Kristi's blog 

and

read about how Allie Mac

started.

Also, you can enter to win a $75 credit

for an Allie Mac!

Ebenezers

Ebenezers.

"stone of help."

Why do I forget?  Why is it that the Good that He has done sometimes fades in the background of everyday life?  When I know and believe in the core of my being, that He is Good.  And He wants Good for me.

Early on in my walk with Christ, someone told me about "raising your ebenezers."  I went searching in the Bible and found this:

Samuel took a large stone and placed it between the towns of Mizpah and Jeshanah. He named it Ebenezer—"the stone of help"—for he said, "Up to this point the Lord has helped us!" —1 Samuel 7:12, NLT

Right now I feel like one of the stones is being chipped and reshaped.  And it doesn't feel so great.  Life is just hard right now.  When things get hard is where sometimes I forget.  But, today I remember.  I am raising my Ebenezers in praise and worship of the One Who loves me more than I can think or imagine.  So, here are a few of my Ebenezers:

• the provision of marriage to my husband.
• the restoration and redemption of our marriage.
• my children get to experience life different than my early years.
• the longing of my real father replaced by my Heavenly father.
• a wonderful step father who loves me like his own.  What a gift.
• sister's in Christ, who lift and encourage me daily.  Who point me to the Lord by showing me His love.
• my real father asking for forgiveness at my grandmother's funeral.

There are so many more.  But, what an awesome way to start my day by remembering all He has done for me.  

This is an amazing blog post on Ebenezers.  

surprise.

Last night as I was putting Lawson to bed, I said to her, "Baby, I am so sorry for the way I talk to you sometimes."  Before I could say anything else she replied, "Momma, I love you all the way to the end of the sky.  Is there an end to the sky, momma?"

Oh, sweet child.  The lessons my children teach me daily force me to my knees.  Oh, how I try and try to do everything and be everything just right.

And fail.  Daily.  Minute.  By.  Minute.

But, I have a choice: I can claim God's Promise's and hear His whispers or I can choose to believe the lies.

There I was confessing my sin to my baby girl and she spoke love to me.  That is exactly what Jesus does.  He loves me.  He tenderly cares for my soul.  Gently brings me back.  Never harsh.  Demanding.  Condemning.

Love.  Tender.  Gentle.

Thank you, sweet Jesus for the ways you so graciously shower me with unexpected blessings. When I see Your face so clearly, I am reminded of Your deep love for me.

It's from the deepest wounds
That beauty finds a place to bloom 
And you will see before the end
That every broken piece is
Gathered in the heart of Jesus
And what's lost will be found again 
"Nothing is Wasted" by Jason Gray

Paul’s Prayer for Spiritual Growth

¹⁴ When I think of all this, I fall to my knees and pray to the Father,^[a] 15 the Creator of everything in heaven and on earth.^[b] 16 I pray that from his glorious, unlimited resources he will empower you with inner strength through his Spirit. ¹⁷ Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong. ¹⁸ And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is. ¹⁹ May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God.

²⁰ Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think. ²¹ Glory to him in the church and in Christ Jesus through all generations forever and ever! Amen.

Thank you.  Thank you.  Thank you.  For watering the roots with my tears and growing and establishing Your Word and Love to the deepest part of my soul.  And binding up the broken places in my heart.  For Your kindness and tenderness toward me, the worst of sinners.  Thank you is not enough.  But, You are enough.  Only You.

756.  red birds that still take my breath away and the reminder that You are with me.
757.  friends who love and encourage me when i am not very lovable.
758.  seeing my nephew last week through skype and his adorable smile and kisses through the computer screen.
759.  sewing with a dear friend.
760.  a monday evening couch catch up with my homegirl.
761.  so many blessings.  and trying to see the blessings instead of fears feels better.  and right.

beyond

beyond failed expectations of myself and others
there is Love.
the kind of Love that will not let you go.

beyond not being able to do everything
there is Love
that can do ALL things.

beyond feeling overwhelmed
there is Love
that can carry our burdens.

beyond myself
there is Love
ready and able to pull us in and Love us right where we are.

beyond today
there is Love
that has tomorrow in His Hands.

dance.

Five Minute Friday.



The ocean.

Something about the ocean amazes and scares me.

Amazes me because God created it.

Scares me because of all creatures that swim around and I can't see them.

Everyone that is close to me knows that I don't go in unless I can see my toenail polish.  The image of the thousands of jellyfish that surrounded me as a child are too much sometimes.  I have missed out on much because of this fear of mine.

But, yesterday it called me in.

And I went.

All.By.Myself.

I stood there in the ocean for at least 30 minutes.  Amazed and not scared.  As I stood there all I could think about is how I was still standing.  The waves would knock me over and I got right back up.  Another one.  Another one.  Another one.  No nibbles on my toes.  No big shark fin popping out in front of me.  Only the beauty of the ocean before me.  And He was calling me to dance.

To live life and dance.  To abide in Him.  And when I fall, He will pick me up.  And He will twirl me around.  And He will whisper, "Dance again.  Keep on dancing, my beloved."  And I will bend my knees and give thanks to Him who created all things.

  "By this we shall know that we are of the truth and reassure our heart before him;  for whenever our heart condemns us, God is greater than our heart, and he knows everything.  Beloved, if our heart does not condemn us, we have confidence before God;  and whatever we ask we receive from him, because we keep his commandments and do what pleases him.  And this is his commandment, that we believe in the name of his Son Jesus Christ and love one another, just as he has commanded us.   Whoever keeps his commandments abides in God, and God in him. And by this we know that he abides in us, by the Spirit whom he has given us."

1John 3:19-24

risk.

risk.

here goes.......

so, it is tuesday of my vacation.  this five minute friday is suppose to take place on friday.  it is tuesday.  but, i am participating anyway.  because in actuality, i never follow rules very well.

risk has always scared me.  many times i have taken risks and things turn out just like i thought they would.  then there are the times when i take the risk and i fail. miserably.  why is it that i let the failure overrule taking another risk?

because i let the bad stuff become easier to believe.

essentially the lies become easier to believe.

and i want it to end.

i don't want to fear taking the risk.

stop fearing the risk.

and jump.

arms out.

palms open.

to what the Lord has for me.

and i know and trust with all my being that He wants good things for me.

for me, allie mac.

and for you.

believe.

it.

and it is worth the risk.

nothing is wasted.

nothing is wasted.

period.

last thursday my sweet husband took the kids to dinner

and

i took to the pavement.

running is therapeutic to me.

i put on my headphones and turned the music up.

the first few steps of running up the hill are torturous,

but i keep on going.

hurt.

so.

good.

right?

many mixed emotions of this day.

one of my closest friends, lorien was driving

from Pittsburgh

to Columbia.

Home.

the past year has been one filled with close friends moving.

maia.

janet.

patty.

gwen.

lorien.

so needless to say i think i had been in denial about her moving back. 

really God?

really?

the tears started to flow with each step i took.

listening to this song by jason gray:

"Nothing is Wasted."

The hurt that broke your heart
And left you trembling in the dark
Feeling lost and alone
Will tell you hope’s a lie
But what if every tear you cry
Will seed the ground where joy will grow

And nothing is wasted
Nothing is wasted
In the hands of our Redeemer
Nothing is wasted

It’s from the deepest wounds
That beauty finds a place to bloom 
And you will see before the end
That every broken piece is
Gathered in the heart of Jesus
And what’s lost will be found again

And nothing is wasted
Nothing is wasted
In the hands of our Redeemer
Nothing is wasted

From the ruins 
From the ashes
Beauty will rise
From the wreckage
From the darkness
Glory will shine

the tears were happy tears.

many tears were shed this past year.

but, those tears were seeds that had grown into Joy.

The kind of Joy that does not fluctuate with emotions or just a bad day.

the Constant.

the Good.

the Love.

the Gift.

the Giver.

of all things.

the lies i believed for so long were being replaced with Truth.

believing that God wants good for me.

that He is in fact Good.

the tears watered the seeds.

the seeds took root.

and are growing.

blooming.

and i see His face more clearly.

and i am thankful.

thankful.

748. Lo and her family moving back.

749. unexpected hugs.

750. smiling after finding a play snake in my bed.

751. the way Leighton looks at me.

752. laughter with Lawson last night as i put her to bed.

753. an amazing sermon this morning at Grace.

754. that despite the years of bitterness and cynicism, God continuously is pursuing me.  changing me.  making me into He wants me to be.  

755.  and the things He has planned for me are better than I can even imagine.  and that my friends is GOOD NEWS.

"Is anything too hard(wonderful) for the Lord?  Genesis 18:14

The answer is No.

 No.

No.

"For nothing will be impossible with God."  Luke 1:37

Glory will shine.

Shine.

On.

And.

On.

And.

On.

and take your breath away.

731.

731.  refreshing time away with friends at the beach.

732.  laughter.

733.  how rain makes everything greener.  

734.  snuggles with my sick girl.

735.  sewing.

736.  creating.designing.learning.

737.  grace.

738.  i know Leighton has been on my gratitude list too many times to count.  but, i am so grateful for him.  how he loves me.  how he shows me Jesus.  every.single.day.  i love you.

739.  my brother in law, Davis, gets home from Afghanistan next month.  

740.  my sister, Susan.  i know she is so pumped that she probably can't contain herself. 

741.  my mom.  she has been through a lot.  raised four girls.  gone through college four times.  married four girls.  an awesome and fun grandmother.  

742.  and what a joy it is to be a momma.

743.  my mother in law.  we have had our fair share of ups and downs.  but, i love her.  and i love that she was such a good momma to Leighton.

744.  that summer will be here soon.

745.  the anticipation of sleeping in......ahhhhhh.

746.  how the Lord has been sewing up places in my heart that I never believed would heal. 

747.  and believing in His Goodness.  and trying to grasp the fact that He does want good for me.  

Thank you, Lord.

Thank you.

"I am the vine; you are the branches.  If a man remains in me and I in Him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing."

John 15:5

Bea.

I got a call three weeks ago that my grandmother did not have long to live.

Bea is my real father's mother.

And I have not seen or talked to him in almost 3 years.

She passed away this past Tuesday.

I knew there was no question if I would go to her funeral.

I just looked up the meaning of her name, Beatrice.

"bringer of joy."

And that was my Bea. 

One of my favorite acrostics for JOY is:

Jesus

Others

Yourself.

This is how she lived her life.

My Bea was a loving wife, amazing mother, daughter, sister, grandmother and friend.

But, she loved the Lord the most.

She lived a simple life.

A life of contentment.

A life of thankfulness.

A life of giving.  And not taking.

One thing that hurt her more than anything was that her son (my dad) was not a good father.

She would tell me every.single.time.i.saw.her.

"I am so sorry he is the way he is.  If it is my fault, I am so sorry."

This was my Bea.

I believe she prayed faithfully everyday for my dad to change.

That is what mothers do.

Pray for their children.

One of her other prayers was that she would be able to stay at home until the Lord called her Home.

And let me tell you.

He honored her prayers.

She passed away at home in her bed. On the farm she loved.  In her sleep.

My nephew said it best, "how amazing that she went to bed and woke up in Heaven."

Oh, sweet Bea.

Yesterday at her funeral, in the visitation room, my father apologized to me. 

He asked me for forgiveness.

He told me he had missed me.  

He hugged me.

And the fear?
Left.

Gone.

I imagine that Bea also prayed for me.

That the Lord would provide.

That I would believe His Promises.

The Lord answered her prayers.

I took pictures of the farm before we left for the funeral.

I took a picture of the bird feeders.

She loved birds.

So do I.

She loved hummingbirds.

I love Cardinals.

Oh, and do you see that beautiful old orange tractor..

Yep.  She drove that thing.

She bush hogged.  She took care of her farm.

She loved nature.

And I believe that is where she meet God.

Where she praised God.

In good times.

And in bad.

She was determined.  Hardworking.  Loving.  Patient.  Kind.  Giving.  Faithful.  Inspiring.  Simple.  Not complicated.  Her smile lit up the room.  Her laughter was contagious.

My Bea.

She knew how to live.

All the way to the end.

Praising the Lord.

Thanking Him.

Soaking up life.

And giving life to others.

Because of Him.

Who loved her.


1 John 4:7-17 (NLT)


I am continuing my gratitude and linking up with Ann Voskamp.


722.  My precious grandmother, Annie Beatrice Hyde.
723.  old orange tractors.
724.  tears that are caught in bottles.
725.  healing of fears.
726.  this hymn. 
727.  Promise Box from Bea's house.
728. girl weekend at the beach.
729. friends.
730. summer is almost here.


Thank you, Lord for Your Daily Bread.  Your Promises and Faithfulness never fail.

remembering.

I went to Germany in October to see my sister Susan and meet my nephew, Grey.  My brother in law is currently serving in Afghanistan (which by the way he gets home today for his two week leave!).  My main objective was to help Susan get Grey back to the United States for a couple of months.  I was there for 8 days.  I learned so much while I was there.  I am going to share one story of many.  But, this story is something I have thought about every.single.day.since.my.return.

We went to Flossenburg Concentration Camp.  We got there at about closing time.  The sun was setting.  The wind was blowing.  It was a sobering moment.  I could not speak.  We walked along and all I could imagine was how many people walked this same ground to their death.  We went up to one section and Susan left to go and feed the baby.  I was there all by myself.

I started to read the plaque.  And immediately I knew one of the men.  Dietrich Bonhoeffer.  It took my breath away.  Still does.  Even thinking about it.  I read about how he was executed 2 weeks before the liberation of Flossenburg.  Oh, sweet Lord.

As I walked, tears streaming down my face and wind blowing and the sun setting.  I was desperately searching for His face.  Where were you, Lord?  Where?

Then I see the monument with the names of the men who gave their lives for Christ.  With a Cross and this scripture:

"for God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control." 2 Timothy 1:7

I hardly have words.

But it is this quote about Bonhoeffer's death that I can't quit thinking about:

The camp doctor who witnessed the execution wrote: “I saw Pastor Bonhoeffer ... kneeling on the floor praying fervently to God. I was most deeply moved by the way this lovable man prayed, so devout and so certain that God heard his prayer. At the place of execution, he again said a short prayer and then climbed the few steps to the gallows, brave and composed. His death ensued after a few seconds. In the almost fifty years that I worked as a doctor, I have hardly ever seen a man die so entirely submissive to the will of God.”<sup>[31]

Think about that.


Then about two weeks after returning from Germany, I am outside with the kids.  A car pulls up slowly.  The lady stops and says, "I am trying to get Mr. Miller to look at your blow up pumpkin (which was a clearance purchase and pretty awesome).  Do you know Mr. Miller?"  Me, "No, I don't."  Lady, "Mr. Miller lives a few houses down.  He is one of the last remaining survivors of Auschwitz."  Then she proceeded to show me the tattoo on his arm.  Took my breath away.  Again.  I had no words.  (Which is unusual for all who know me well;))

I googled Mr. Miller.  He suffered a stroke 20 years ago and had not spoken since.  This is the article that I read.  Mr.  Miller passed away in December.  I just found a video that a local news station did on Mr. Miller.  


These two men never lost their faith.  And they have given me Hope.  And changed me. 


And stirred in me the question, "Am I willing to be submissive to the will of God?  No matter what it looks like?"


I will always remember.  Because remembering is good.  Even if the situation was not.  Remembering helps to keep our eyes and heart fixed on the Lord.</sup> 

cherish.

There are so many things that have happened in the past few months.  I am having a hard time wrapping my head and my heart around it all.  And that is what I usually try to do.  Figure it all out.  Try to write the perfect post.  Then beat myself down.  Oh, the cycle.

The above pictures are me at or around the same age as Lawson.  Five to Five and a half years old.  My mom handed me a bag of old pictures when I was visiting home the last time.  A few days after we returned to our home, I opened up the bad.  I was overcome with emotion.  Lawson looks so much like me.  But, the one thing that is different is that Lawson feels secure.  She feels treasured.  She knows she is cherished.

How do I know this?  Well, her daddy comes home every night excited to see her.  She lights up when she sees her daddy.  She runs to him (most of the time.  we are not the Beaver's.  i promise.)  Sometimes she squeals.  My mom told me that some of the hardest times for her to watch me was when my real father just wouldn't show to pick me up for his visitation.  I can't even imagine how my mom must have felt.  I ache over some of the smallest things with my own children.

Looking back, I don't remember those instances, but it does explain the lifelong struggle that has ensued because of it.  The thought that I can't do anything to make someone love me.  I will never be enough.  You will get to know me and want to leave.  And you will never want to come back.  Then when and if you do show back up, I owe you something.  And that something will never be enough to make you want to stay.

I spent my life building little ways to protect myself.  So ingrained I didn't even notice.  Until I reached the pit.  The place where my face couldn't fall any further past the ground.  The dirt and grime of struggling to protect myself.  Make everything just so.  So my family would not have to suffer like I did.  They would have what I did not.

While I was busy building all these little "protection mechanisms", I realized that I had absolutely no control over how my family would turn out.  And this made me mad.  It made me angry.  It made me tired.  It made me panic.  It made me scared.  It made me call out to God.  Because I didn't think I could go on.

I thought my family would be better off without me.  (I was not suicidal.  But, I did want to leave.  Not sure where I would have gone.)

Oh, how it pains me to even write that.  How could I feel like that when I love them more than the air I breathe.  How, Lord?  Why, Lord?  What are You doing to me, Lord?  You (The Lord) are going to leave too.  Maybe You are taking them from me.  This is punishment for my own wretchedness.  Awesome.  Great.

But, in His great mercy, He has chiseled and chiseled so many things off my soul.  He has taught me so much.  In looking at the above pictures, He has given me eyes to see His love for me in a very different way.  I can see Him in my husband.  I can see Him in my children.  I see His love for me in the way He has restored my family.  Redeemed and restored the things that were broken.  I see His goodness to me.  And I am thankful.  Especially when I look at the pictures below.  I get to see a little bit of what I would have been like as a child.  And He whispers in my ear, "Trust me, Allison.  Trust me.  I have you in the Palm of My Hand.  Your name is engraved there.  (Isaiah 49:16)  And I am not ever going to leave you or forsake you.  (Joshua 1:5)  My Promises are true.  I want you to have good things.  (Jeremiah 32:37-41, 2 Peter 1:4)  I will not bring you harm.  I will keep chiseling and you keep trusting, Me."

joy and doubt

"But the secret of joy is to keep seeking God where you doubt He is."

Ann Voskamp.

I opened her book like I do every so often.

Especially when I am seeking Him.

And I read the sentence above.

Over and Over I recited this in my head.

Where are the places I have doubted God?

I started listing them in my head.

All the way to the most current doubts.

And all of the doubts have led me to Him.

Not away from Him.

Even though I might not sense His presence,
keep seeking His Face.

I can't tell you how many drafts I have written and not posted.
I have felt pretty dry in the writing department.
Or maybe I have been running away a little.
Or maybe it was just soaking up time with the kids.
We have had such a wonderful summer.
We are blessed.

Continuing with giving thanks........

707.  precious time in the mountains with MB.
708.  that the mountain lion that MB's parents saw was not there when we were there.
709.  for the transition to a new school.
710.  for both of my children to like school.
711.  daily grace that i receive.
712.  clean clothes.
713.  clipping hydrangeas to dry.
714.  fun day at the lake with our friends.
715.  laughter.
716.  that mac likes baseball.
717.  the courage of a dear friend going back to work.  she has a true gift.  so proud of you:)
718.  for the cardinal with a messed up head who shows up just when i need to see him.
719.  drawing near to my children when they have upset me.
720.  compassion instead of harshness.
721.  leighton. 
 

^{1 Peter 5:6-14.}

⁶ Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, ⁷ casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you. ⁸ Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. ⁹ Resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same kinds of suffering are being experienced by your brotherhood throughout the world. ¹⁰And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you. ¹¹ To him be the dominion forever and ever. Amen.

Final Greetings

 ¹²By Silvanus, a faithful brother as I regard him, I have written briefly to you, exhorting and declaring that this is the true grace of God. Stand firm in it. ¹³She who is at Babylon, who is likewise chosen, sends you greetings, and so does Mark, my son. ¹⁴ Greet one another with the kiss of love.  
    Peace to all of you who are in Christ.

Light

So, my posts have been pretty deep lately. The last post was inspired after stripping all of the toys out of La's room. It has been coming. She now has just books in her room.

I also took all or her clothes and left her with 8 outfits and 2 dresses. You may ask why. Well, she is quite the fashionista. She takes biker shorts to another level. She changes outfits 20 times a day. Throws tantrums when she can't wear something.

We have already seen an improvement. I do not think I am going to put toys back in her room. She does still have toys in the porch. I am planning on doing some organizing tomorrow:).

These are a few things I al thankful for:

•my immersion blender.
•banana and peanut butter smoothie. Every. Single. Day.
•air condition. Especially in South Carolina heat.
•my parents safely arrived in Germany.
•becoming an aunt again.
•an amazing testimony I heard at church today.
•tide and downy. Mmmmmm.
•clean sheets.
•tacos al carbon. Here I come.
•friends.
•tootsie roll. The song. You know what I am talking about:). It helped me on my run this am in 100 degrees:)





















- Posted using BlogPress from
my iPhone

stripped.

The Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines stripped as:

 

a : to remove clothing, covering, or surface matter from  

b : to deprive of possessions  

c : to divest of honors, privileges, or functions

When I truly began to walk with the Lord 4 1/2 years ago, I was stripped.

I remember my mother telling me over the phone, 

"Baby, get down on your knees and pray.  He is the only One Who can help you."

I hung up the phone and got on my knees.

Burning tears streaming down my face.

I cried out to the Lord.

Ever since that day, the Lord has been wooing me to Himself.

I felt stripped.

My heart was changing.

I didn't quite understand what was going on.

But, now I see.

I had to be brought to my knees.

I had to know that He was the Only way.

Not my way.

I pretty much did anything to avoid suffering.  

Most of the time I would just stick these hurts in a box and put them on a shelf.

But, you see these boxes filled with broken pieces of my heart,

were falling down.

I was drowning in the sorrows of all my suffering.

It was only in the waves,

struggling to breath

is where I found

Him.

I couldn't manipulate my way out of the pain.

I was stripped.

To the core of my soul.

In His grace and His mercy,

He stripped me of my coverings and the surface matters,

to get to my heart.

To see my sin.

My wretched, wretched heart.

And change it from the inside out.

Ever since that day and until the day I meet Him face to face,

He chips a little more off that He doesn't want to be there.

But, every time I am stripped,

He restores.

He gives me hope.

He fills me with His Truth.

And from the stripping

my love for Him grows.

And grows.

And grows.

He picks me up when I fall.

He is tender.

He is full of compassion.

He wants what is best for me.

He loves me more than I can imagine.

And I trust Him.

701.  my brother in law, Davis, who is about to deploy to Afghanistan.  Two weeks after the birth of his first child.

702.  my sister, Susan, who is about to have her first baby and her husband leave for war.

703.  for the sacrifice others give for our freedom.

704.  that Jesus was the Sacrifice.  so we could have life.  freedom in Him.

705.  that I am a new creation.  the old is being stripped off.  layer.  by layer.

706.  and the new is growing toward the Light.